I sit here tormented by an endlessly repeating instrumental guitar, as I wait for someone to pick up my call so I can simply tell them who they should now contact in order to get their money. I’m continually reminded that I ‘can go online’ to submit my information, which as a intelligent, functioning member of society I am entirely aware of. I just choose not to, as I’d like to ensure these changes are acknowledged by a real human being & processed correctly.
I’ve noticed how my one year old phone has slowed in recent weeks. There has been no firmware updates, hardware damage or installation of bloated application updates. Here’s some more emoji’s! Here’s some advice!! Not all your users are twelve years old!!! I think back to the first phone I ever got, where the only internet access was to WAP sites – the most simple, text based sites of all. Admittedly, the novelty of being able to remotely access the then still embryonic internet far outweighed it’s quality or usefulness. The advent of the original iPhone changed the game forever. The original that is. The follow ups were clear marketing ‘improvements’. My Mitsubishi phone from the nineties, however simple, lasted me a good four to five years in a time of rapidly developing technology.
One week ago, as I was settled into my weekend night enjoying a documentary, the lamp on my projector unexpectedly exploded. In the years of technological maturity that we have seen since 2010, I am still subject to something exploding in an electronic device.
At some point or another, quality has been cast aside in favour of margins. The commodifiable has been quantified, repackaged & sold back to us wherever possible, as we search for something that will bring us closer to a dream that it itself, has been marketed to us as one & the same; that doesn’t exist.
All of this is done with efficiency in mind, mostly outsourced in the case of my above examples to what has become the workshop of the world: China. As with any country, they need to carve out their place in the world to maximise whatever resources they have, which is manpower. Competition for opportunities to work means people sacrifice much to work in any opportunity that becomes available, as they themselves pursue a dream that does not exist. In fact, the very same one that gets marketed to their Western counterparts who will buy the things they manufacture. It’s the same story in every country. Textiles in Bangladesh & Vietnam. Diamonds in Botswana. Services in the UK. Everyone’s in the same boat, trying to accumulate as much as they can, as quickly as possible, in order to achieve the dream that doesn’t exist.
Even if you’re industrious, fortunate or incredibly skilled, when you get there, you’ll realise that dream wasn’t what you thought it might be. Sure, you might enjoy it for a while but because your idea of it has come from something that was repackaged & sold to you long ago, the reality will never match the idea. That’s the very essence of marketing anything; this thing or experience will change everything you dislike about yourself or your current situation.
See the fragile nature of those people (typically women) who can’t wait to throw themselves under the knife of plastic surgery. It’s as clear as the midday sun of a tropical country to anyone with even the slightest bit of insight, that these people need proper psychological help in the majority of cases. But that’s like an unchecked alcoholic turning down a beer that’s right in front of him, standing up & voluntarily walking himself into a rehabilitation clinic – it’s only going to happen in the most rare of circumstances. When money is at stake, no one is going to give you an honest answer & if they do, & it’s something you don’t want to hear, you’re going to go & see someone else who is going to tell you what you want to hear. Most of what most people appear to deliberate outwardly, they’ve already decided. Those with enough fear are ready, & just waiting for the person to say or do enough, to enable them. It’s just the right combination of conduct, words & style that will unlock that will. That’s how you convince someone with self esteem issues that plastic surgery will make her feel worth as a person. It’s how you convince someone your phone will be the one that will complete their peer acceptance. It’s how you convince a girl in a club to sleep with you the same night. It’s how you convince a wife that fucking you behind her husband’s back will make her feel young or desired again.
Then the reality kicks in. The breast enlargement wasn’t quite the size or shape that you wanted. No one is impressed with your new phone because they’ve all brought the same one. The one stand amounted to nothing more than a guy pleasing himself & the wife, lays there at night with the guilt running through her mind (temporarily at least) as she cosies up to him. The cycle doesn’t end, because you succumbed to something fake. Something which was a low quality, temporary fix, for a low quality person. And the symptoms grow beneath the surface, growing ever larger until the desperation draws them to the same or a similar circumstance once again, & they are condemned to an ever repeating cycle, unless something significant happens.
‘Something significant’ normally means some sort of breakdown or at the very least a magnificent, landmark epiphany, normally drawn on by the aforementioned desperation reaching a critical point. The point where that unseen essence that exists within us, finally has enough & rises up in a tangible form. This vary from a realisation & subsequent change in direction in the best case, through to incurable physical maladies in the worst. It all depends how long you’ve been in denial, how unfortunate you’ve been in associating with people who aggravate or soothe your underlying insecurities & how detached you’ve become from who you really are underneath.
A lot of this can be avoided, by abandoning the safety of the internet, getting out there, doing things, pushing yourself, putting yourself outside of your comfort zone to an appropriate degree & staying away from clearly destructive behaviours. Attempt to be honest with yourself & look at the root cause of your symptoms, rather than masking the symptoms. Observe yourself if you must, see what makes you happy, what you think makes you happy & make changes accordingly. Substitute bad escapism for better escapism, & recognise we all must rest at times, & that there is nothing wrong with that. Enjoy the simple things life has to offer, as well as the fruits of your labour. Bring yourself closer to good people & distance yourself from those who bring only negativity. They must find their own way, & will come to you when they are read for your help, or when they have completed their own work & want to show you the new version of themselves, to reconcile. Understand that whatever image of themselves a person projects, they still breathe, piss & shit like we all do. Everyone was born the same, but we choose where if we bathe ourselves in knowledge or shit; to participate in the idiocy or not.