Modeled to scale on author, with focus on ‘Samuel’.
As I travel between destinations & make my way across Serbia (why I haven’t been there I’ve no idea) as part of the ‘Three Five Six’ tour (incidentally looking more like the ‘Three Five Five’ tour after Shy Student inexplicably found Main’s fashion blog & subsequently Facebook out of the blue – Facebook is a man’s worst enemy), I thought it would be a good time to do my 2014 award ceremony. I’d been meaning to do it for some time & 2014 being an eventful year, thought as being the last opportunity before we completely move on to pastures new & 2014 slowly degenerates in our memories.
Strictly speaking, these awards won’t only include those mentioned on Words Of A Man to date, as there were others in 2014 before the blog started. So let’s commence.
Most Honest Girl: Shieldmaiden, to a confusing degree. Although I think she was trying to test me a bit & was more of a whore than me, she was honest to the extent where is actually strayed into vulgarity & I went from liking her, to disliking her, to liking her again & then finally treating her as a test case almost, despite having nothing more than a kiss. A true sexual adventurer, eclipsing even me. My true commiserations to the two idiots she was purely dating who idolised her, while she fucked three other guys on the side.
Biggest Hassle Female: Easily Shy Student. Despite my efforts to not see her again, her insistence wore me down & I couldn’t help but start fucking her again. We had great chemistry & there’s nothing that turns me on more than seeing a normally feminine & demure woman, staring in your eyes & gritting her teeth as you fuck her up against the wall, her enjoying every thrust. She drove me wild, I can’t deny it.
But Jesus, the hassle was unprecedented. From the original calls at work, through to a face to face meeting with her technical husband, to the final night we were together where she stayed the entire night with me where she slept & I laid completely awake, watching the missed calls rack up to forty seven throughout the entire night, hearing him wondering through the whole city (including my area) shouting her name.
It wasn’t fear, I fear no man. I actually felt sorry for him when we met. But she simply wasn’t interested in him any longer. We couldn’t really go out, so the arrangement of her coming to my house, having mind blowing sex & then her happily leaving again was too easy. It was just the hassle of knowing this guy was constantly on the scene.
I’ll never understand how a man can still desire & love a woman who is clearly desiring other men. I can only put it down to naivety. But you never know what a man driven mad can do.
Most Psycho Female: Without question, Croatian. I don’t believe I’ve covered her in the blog as it was before my first post, but the short version is: met via networking site, had a few dates, slept together a few times, everything fine, she wanted more, I said no, she said she didn’t want to see me again & I said OK. Agreed to be friends. Then she kept inviting me to her place for tea or household help, which always resulted in her jumping on me. Arranged to meet her later one week, then the previous day she sent me a text out of the blue telling me I was ‘terrible in bed’, had the ‘smallest dick she’d ever seen’ (amusingly spelt ‘samualest’ in her textual fury, leading it to be christened forevermore as ‘Samuel’) & finally she’d ‘only had sex with me’ because she’d ‘felt sorry for me’.
Interesting as she’d initiated practically every meeting we’d had since I told her I didn’t want anything serious & the week prior to that message, she’d said sex with me was like ‘being in a porno’ (something more than one girl has said to me previously).
So yes, in keeping with the 2015 resolution of every post containing some woman advice, this weeks lesson is simply: don’t fuck nutters.
Horniest Female: I don’t generally have a problem with women being horny. But the emotional side some women seem almost obliged to mention can ruin it for me. So for raw horndom, I’d have to give this one to Asian Pornstar. Perhaps it was mainly me being her first man since coming out of a long, dry sounding marriage, but I’ve rarely met anyone so readily willing to get down to fucking or anything sexual at any time. We’re talking about a woman who had already had three orgasms, made me orgasm & then immediately start giving me head again because she wanted to fuck me again.
No emotional bullshit; just literally ‘If you’re horny, you can always call me’. How refreshing & hence, the winner of this category.
Easiest Female: It’s got to be FreAlg, based on the fact I don’t actually ever remember taking her on an actual date. We initially saw each other at the gym, then exchanged some intense looks on a couple of subsequent bus trips, & then I’m almost certain I got her number she at the gym, which was followed by me inviting her to my place. Once there, I offered her tea & went for it. Some initial hesitation about ‘would it be the only time’ was assuaged by myself, to result in regular meetings of us meeting at my place, catching up & then fucking each other like crazy.
A good woman, despite her unfaithfulness to her husband. Some people do have their reasons I learnt from this, despite him also sounding like a good man.
Best Relationship Potential Female: I don’t think it could be anyone really. I guess the closest could be the RussianWitch to maintain my current lifestyle with all the benefits of a relationship, or BM-13 if I wanted to settle down. Maybe even YAU for enjoyment of non-bedroom (kitchen table) time. Main obviously had potential in my mind, but I can’t really give it to anyone. A generally disappointing year in that regard.
Best Personality Female: Closely related to the previous category, YAU puts in a strong nomination for this category as she’s really nice, proactive, independent, no hassle at all & we’ve had some great chats, but I’d have to give it to BM-13, who pretty much made me feel like a naive sixteen year old again with the amount of emotion she inspired within me. Open hearted, loving, caring, humble, hardworking, determined… The list goes on & on.
We are still in touch, as I meant what I said about always being there for her in some capacity, but her father recently died & him being a key figure for her, she’s understandably now going through some key personality changes. I am trying to support her but hopefully the experience will enhance her determination to be the best she can, rather than close her down to resignation.
Most Pretty Female: Based purely on looks in the face & doing my best to disregard personality, I could say SDG. But I never actually slept with her. Once she’d got into her workplace, she pretty much got chewed up by the corporate machine never to be seen again. So just pipping the RussianWitch at the post is YAU, who always made an incredible effort no matter the circumstances to look amazing. Model material.
Best Body Female: Cameroonian wins this category. Although almost immediately realising she’d be on the ‘I want more’ train before I knew it, I threw caution to the wind & decided to enjoy the killer body she was rocking. Huge, pert, natural breasts; the roundest & perfectly sized ass you could imagine (like it was slightly too big for her) & everything else bang in proportion.
No desire to give head & the inevitable wave of ‘I want more’ soon killed off Caneroonian’s prospects before any time had passed for something to naturally develop, but for those few brief initial occasions, seeing that body perched up on her living room table as the dinner she had prepared for me slowly cooked in the background & she told me ‘I like it a lot’ in her sexy accent as I went to town on her, was a visual that’ll stay with me for some time.
Biggest Mistake By Unjaded Female: Probably the RussianWitch in early 2014; named as so not because of a terrible personality but because she played some online games as a witch or wizard character.
Quick breakdown; met in gym, then randomly at bus stop, she was married but clearly miserable. She came to my place & had really good sex for about three months. She was fucking other people & so was I, but we both acknowledged we were the best for each other sexually, to the point where if she’d had bad sex with someone, she’d arrange to see me to restore her faith in it. She started divorce proceedings (note she didn’t start anything officially until she thought she had some insurance cock lined up) & soon after started making noises with me about a more serious relationship.
I of course, didn’t think her trustworthy at all & of course said no repeatedly. We did however go for a weekend away which was a superb mix of sights, sand & again, amazing sex. Upon our return, she kept pushing for a relationship to an impressive degree, even waiting for me at my apartment one day. Although some might see this as a bit psychotic, for me I was actually impressed. She left that day with my proposal of an open relationship.
This is where I made the mistake. Perhaps as a result of becoming too confident with the influence I had over her or me being blase because of the amount of women I had throwing themselves at me, I again said no even after she had agreed to this. She was open to experimentation with other women, had a great figure, long blonde hair, was very pretty & the sex was amazing. She didn’t want kids & even was into my other interests. I was on a power trip & didn’t take advantage of this opportunity perhaps.
In hindsight, she’d actually been pretty open with me since the beginning.
Best Other Sexual Experience: Easy. Being enthusiastically jacked off by a horny Lithuanian lawyer who I’d just gone down on, with her still in her office clothes. Amazing.
Best Blowjob Female: One of the easiest: BBP. Although things burnt out pretty quickly, her blowjob ability was absolutely one of the top three I have received in my life & that’s not something I say lightly. God bless the men (note; plural) that taught her that.
Best Sex Female: A competitive category, I’ve been very fortunate to have had very little bad sex this year. The worst for sex itself was probably BBP for her tendency to try & rip my head off by hanging on my neck (but she made up for it in a big way with the oral) or Cameroonian, who wasn’t proactive at all (but made up for it by having an incredible body). Another contender would be MMR who I haven’t mentioned much here but after escalating to a few wines absolutely fucked the shit out of me but seemed to be nursing some serious mental issues as she repeated ‘I love you’ with practically every thrust I made into her as we had sex for the first time, which was very off putting to say the least. In fairness she did try to warn me in advance, which I ignored as I knew I’d be leaving in the coming weeks & there was furious chemistry between us.
Incidentally, I must mention this is the first woman who I have slept with using direct bravado, where one of my initial messages to her was ‘I really know how to fuck’. True, but not usually an opening gambit. It seemed to sow the seeds of intrigue somewhere inside so job done anyway.
Coming back to best sex, there’s strong competition. Shy Student & I could fuck for hours without ever wanting it to stop. The RussianWitch was the only girl to make me orgasm so hard my breathe temporarily left me & I momentarily thought I was genuinely about to have a heart attack mid-way through. Watching YAU determinedly tried to make me shoot my load all over her while never losing eye contact was highly arousing too.
But I think I’ll have to give this prestigious award to another girl from the archives of early 2014; JapYog. A Japanese yoga teacher from another unhappy marriage, who I met at the gym while furiously conducting my workout. Initial contact didn’t yield anything, but after another meeting & some hot wine starting in early 2014, several months of horny, lustful sex regularly occurred. Although she got a bit clingy towards the end as her husband decided to move to Hong Kong & being visa dependent, she was obliged to go with him, those interim months were fantastic for me. From a superb body, round ass, excellent oral skills, willingness to do anything I wished & that special willingness to jump around & finish me in her mouth every time as I finished, JapYog is hailed here as the best of 2014.